13 years and 12 days ago, I did it. I took a huge gulp. Up to that point, I’d never touched the stuff because it was cheap and so, well, uncool. Oh sure, I’d pour myself some every week, making sure the right people saw me holding the glass but I never actually drank it.
The thing is though, I was always thirsty. Pretty stupid, really, because I had my very own jug of that sugary drink complete with an easy-pour spout but I could never bring myself to actually take a sip.
Until early that warm August morning.
I was kind of desperate, really. I’d been walking in a desert for years and at that point seemed to be running out of asphalt ahead. I had many things one could want- a great job, fat salary, a beautiful home- but not one thing my heart longed for. I was dry. Absolutely parched. And worse, I had become a person I despised; a fake. A bonafide poser.
I hated myself. I cared so much about what people thought of me that I’d become anything they wanted if I could gain some mileage. Such a fraud. I knew I had become a hypocrite, spitting in God’s face for years while dressed up in my white Cathy Christian best. I can’t explain it but after years of having looked at that gleaming faucet, that morning I decided I was sick of it all and just simply took a sip. It was so amazing I had to have another. Before I could stop myself I wrapped my lips around the spigot and took a big gulp straight out of the tap. I suddenly realized I was right in front of Him with that STUFF oozing down my chin. I had to have looked hideous but I just didn’t give a rip. And Him? He didn’t seem to notice my pink-stained blouse and instead said something that rocked my world. Instead of pointing out my ugliness He told me I was perfect because He said He saw me through His Son. And then He told me He loved me. God, Who created the world and everything in it, said He loved ME… and just wanted me to come home. And in that moment- for the first time in my life- I believed Him. And I did.
Yeah, I drank the KoolAid that morning. The stuff anyone has access to and can afford. And I don’t care what anyone thinks about my beverage choice except the One who has quenched my thirst.
Makes me wonder: why do we avoid something that could make our lives so much richer? What are we afraid of?
“Though your sins are as scarlet, they will be as white as snow.” Isaiah 1:18
Sylvia is a singer and Christian women’s speaker, and lives in Southern California.